a letter to a friend, january 22nd, 4:00 p.m.
August 17th, 9:01 P.M. 
i’ve posted this before, but edited it a bunch and hope i can call it done now (again)
August 28th 3:46 PM

I feel pain
Sweet and unyielding
I feel this month’s rejection
like a pit in my stomach.
I feel the dizziness
from last night’s dose of medicine.
I feel ashamed
of the beast it brings out of me.

But,

I feel pride, for
the people who surround me
I feel relief, that
I am, indeed, not truly alone.
I feel the fire
that I’m bringing into my lungs;
inhale, exhale
inhale, exhale
I feel my heart
continuing to beat in my chest
I feel the blood
coursing through my veins.
I feel the sun
kissing the back of my neck
I feel the wind
whispering through my hair.

And I know now
I am alive
I have lived
and I will be okay.

(Source: frozemyheartinsolitude)

August 14th 10:49 PM

I am filth
I am nothing but dust and bones.
and I will die
just like everyone else.

(Source: frozemyheartinsolitude)

August 4th 12:09 AM

I am lost
all sense of self has eroded
with the fast-paced current
of a love lost.

I remain scattered
pieces of me floating around
Spectres, abstract concepts
in this ephemeral bay of uncertainty

I stay hopeful
my ladder might be built strong
so I can meticulously climb out of the depths
of my own dark mind.

(Source: frozemyheartinsolitude)

Monday July 22, 12:29 A.M.

In the absence of a partner
I have lost all perspective
Oh myself, on
reality.
I must break the chains
That surround my brain;
I must stop myself
from wanting.

Oh, how my heart has been
flooded with emotion,
In their abundance they have broken
Out of my heart and into my lungs.
Every inner crevice
Fills and bursts,
I am drowning
imploding,
dying
As all my life experiences and conditioning
add up to prove my inability
My uselessness
in preventing my own disaster.

(Source: frozemyheartinsolitude)

July 13th, 10:44 P.M.

In what seems like a past life, I stood upon a precipice. From this perilous point I could see a bridge, leading to, presumably, safety. The bridge was a mighty thing to behold: it was built upon sturdy foundations and was composed of the strongest materials. I gazed long and hard at this path, even walked a fair distance on it. But my mind sought freedom and i decided to leap off the side instead, into the endless abyss. The darkness rushed to meet me as I hurtled downwards. The air screamed past my ears as I was falling, falling, falling.

Now, 3 months have passed and I no longer know if I am still falling or if I have hit the bottom. My mind and body have lost all solidarity and I cannot tell if I am in the darkness, or if the darkness is within me.

(unfinished, think it needs more editing. constructive criticism wanted)

(Source: frozemyheartinsolitude)

July 10th 11:24 P.M.

Tonight, I feel empty. For far too long I have expended my energies on things that will not bring me any happiness, or rather, people. Did it hurt, to plunge that dagger into my back? Or was it simply an err in judgement, a slip of the cock? I fear I largely misjudged your character; I saw something in you that was beautiful, to be admired. But maybe all I gazed upon was your mask, the devious deceitful image many of us present to the world in order to get what we want.
Even so, it is very likely that I mistook your affection and interest in my endeavours to be a form of a deeper care - well, shame on me. Though the act you committed is despicable, it cannot be denied that I knew our mutual agreement was to be kept cold with little to no attachment. Therefore, I shame myself for feeling any sort of connection with you, shame myself for trusting that you were even aware of my basic feelings, and shame myself for not being able to rid myself of these longing thoughts.

(Source: frozemyheartinsolitude)

June 15th 11:51 pm

i am annoying.












june 13th 11:42 PM

sinking
through an
ocean
of insecurities
craving
love and
care
will I
find
any clarity?

obsessing
over you
this,
is useless.

(Source: frozemyheartinsolitude)